The other night, Ted Leo and the Pharmacists played a rock show at the Empty Bottle. Adam and I had gone to Reckless for an in-store performance earlier in the day, but in my personal opinion, you can't get too much of that sound. The newish record is on Lookout, so go pick it up today, today, today. I had gone to the show by myself, so for about 15 minutes, I stood and watched the A-Set alone. Some guy kept shifting closer to me with every little indie rocker head-bob. I don't know if this was done on purpose, or if he was unaware of his encroachment on my Coke-sippin' territory. Either way, I was very happy to later find a human torch and Mr. Party J esus because awkwardness loves company, especially the company of good Michigan people.
Is it abnormal to have only two pairs of jeans? An informal poll says yes. A salesguy at the Crap (ho ho, that's THE GAP) seemed shocked, absolutely shocked when I said that I had only two pairs. He steered me toward some low-riders and some hiphug gers and some bunhuggers too. I told him that none of those would fit, but he believed otherwise. Five minutes later, in the fitting room, I laughed loudly because there's no way those pants would look good on anybody over 15.
The thing is, my two pairs of jeans are not so cute. I have had the first pair for a year and I've washed them maybe four times. Every time I wash them, they shrink a little bit, but only in the posterior. Perhaps the ol' rump is seeing the effect of one too many croissants. The other pair of jeans-what was I thinking? They are all stretchy and would probably be fine if I were, oh, Jennifer Lopez, and I liked showing off my derriere. But I'm not, and I don't, and the only reason I bought those flashdance ass pants was that they were something like 80% off. Dummy dummy.
So I went to the Diesel store today and found a lovely pair of jeans-just the right balance of messiness and crisp lines, none of that flared-leg hippie nonsense-but they cost $125. Call me a big cheapo, but that is too much money to pay for a pair of pan ts that can be ruined by some schmutz on a bus seat. A prisoner of skirts, I remain.
Haven't fed squirrels in months. Must get back to that. Must get back to basics and rule over acornian subjects with the crown and scepter of the Squirrel Emperor.
Is it abnormal to have only two pairs of jeans? An informal poll says yes. A salesguy at the Crap (ho ho, that's THE GAP) seemed shocked, absolutely shocked when I said that I had only two pairs. He steered me toward some low-riders and some hiphug gers and some bunhuggers too. I told him that none of those would fit, but he believed otherwise. Five minutes later, in the fitting room, I laughed loudly because there's no way those pants would look good on anybody over 15.
The thing is, my two pairs of jeans are not so cute. I have had the first pair for a year and I've washed them maybe four times. Every time I wash them, they shrink a little bit, but only in the posterior. Perhaps the ol' rump is seeing the effect of one too many croissants. The other pair of jeans-what was I thinking? They are all stretchy and would probably be fine if I were, oh, Jennifer Lopez, and I liked showing off my derriere. But I'm not, and I don't, and the only reason I bought those flashdance ass pants was that they were something like 80% off. Dummy dummy.
So I went to the Diesel store today and found a lovely pair of jeans-just the right balance of messiness and crisp lines, none of that flared-leg hippie nonsense-but they cost $125. Call me a big cheapo, but that is too much money to pay for a pair of pan ts that can be ruined by some schmutz on a bus seat. A prisoner of skirts, I remain.
Haven't fed squirrels in months. Must get back to that. Must get back to basics and rule over acornian subjects with the crown and scepter of the Squirrel Emperor.
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