I woke up proud of myself for remembering about the 8:50 am doctor's appointment I'd had scheduled. Snacked on yogurt, caught the bus, got a seat, made it to the doc's on time. The sky was blue and the air was sweet, and I found myself enjoying the brief wedge of Lake Michigan that's visible from my doctor's building. Even the grumpy receptionist and the drooly toddler in the waiting room couldn't snap me out of my good mood. "I am taking care of my health," I mentally congratulated myself. "I am a responsible grown-up."
The nurse weighed me (114), took my blood pressure (100/60) and I read Allure while waiting for the doctor. She remembered me upon seeing my face, which I think is probably due to my memorable hypochondria. She looked at my chart while listening to my latest hypochondriac worry, and then she stopped and looked up. "You're due for a pap smear!" she announced. I groaned.
When you are wearing a paper cloth around your wobbly bits, there is nothing you can do to weasel your way out of a pap smear. I know because I've tried to talk my way out of various gynecological adventures, and every time the speculum wins.
The nurse weighed me (114), took my blood pressure (100/60) and I read Allure while waiting for the doctor. She remembered me upon seeing my face, which I think is probably due to my memorable hypochondria. She looked at my chart while listening to my latest hypochondriac worry, and then she stopped and looked up. "You're due for a pap smear!" she announced. I groaned.
When you are wearing a paper cloth around your wobbly bits, there is nothing you can do to weasel your way out of a pap smear. I know because I've tried to talk my way out of various gynecological adventures, and every time the speculum wins.
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