(this is annie)


I wasn't laughing like that.

I worked late tonight, and the sun was just beginning to sink when I left the building. A middle-aged, legless man was making his way up the street in a wheelchair. His face showed the accumulated stresses of an uneasy life, but he didn't look defeated or miserable. Just tired, maybe a little lonely. I gave him a smile as I walked by, then he turned and looked at my shoes. He asked, "Can't I get you to walk me somewhere in those heels?"

I smiled and started laughing a little bit. I always do this when strangers flirt with me; it's a nervous response, and of course it makes me happy to be noticed, so it's a genuine laugh. "Not tonight," I replied. I was nice, I was friendly.

"Please," he said. "I'll do anything for you to come with me." It was more sweet than sad, the kind of line that makes me crack a smile. "No, but thank you," I said before wishing him a good night and going on my way.

Halfway down the block, my grin fell as I wondered if my laughter, borne of delight and surprise, could have been interpreted as that of scorn and mockery. It's been hours and I still can't stop thinking about the man on Sutter Street, pushing himself up that hill.

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    it's anniet at gmail.


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