Seddu knew one of the bouncers, and before long we were inside the doors. Unfortunately, there were no celebrities to be ogled--apparently they were invited to the VIP party earlier that night. Since we were already at the club, we decided to stay anyway. A montage of soft porn scenes played on an oversize screen, and a DJ spun bad dance music. The floor was filled with mostly men trying to look casual, as if they had no idea that this was a party for a porn rag. Suits abounded. "Looks like it's time to pick up an investment banker," joked Tali.

Ever the gentleman, Seddu bought us drinks before we explored more of the club. En route to the dance floor, we spotted a table to the side. And there, clad in metallic blazers and wearing enough makeup to make Tammy Faye Bakker weep with envy, was a Penthouse Pet. A handful of men stood slightly close to her, smirking and saying oh-so-witty things that they thought she couldn't hear. But they also looked somewhat unsettled, like they couldn't handle the pinup girl in real life instead of on glossy paper. As for the woman herself, she looked like she was very, very tired of being polite to half-drunk men.

She didn't look too tired to talk with a few nice girls from Michigan, though, so we approached her. Feeling rather awkward, I asked for her autograph. She smiled sweetly and then wrote this exclamatory message on an 8x10 glossy: To ANNIE! All my love! VIKKA! That's right, all her love. Every last bit. Then, she kindly posed for a photograph with the twins and me. What fun!

With the prized photograph in our possession,our group finally made it to the main dance floor.

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