8.06.98
Special Evan-written edition!
At the moment, Annie and I are on board an Amtrak train to spend the weekend at her parent's house. While she's grabbing some overpriced, pre-packaged cheesecake that tastes more like plastic than German chocolate, I have the rare privelege of composing today's Daily entry.
Ohoh, Annie is back, and is rather upset that she had to wait too long in line for yucky cheesecake that was supposed to be "nice flavor (whatever the hell that is)," not German chocolate. If only we could get that damn coconut schlock off of it, everything would be just peachy.
By the way, I should mention that Annie has a cooler-than-you contest where you can win neato soapy stuff from the Body Shop, plus get weekly Out of Order email updates. Go looky and sign up. You too may already be a winner.
I am going to go to law school next year. I will be a big robust lawyer type who makes lots of money. There is a lawyer running for governor; his name is Geoffrey Fieger. He exercises and ITS FIEGER TIME AIFUHFUJKDSHJDSHFDS A MUST FIEGER WIN HE MUST I AM EVAN KRAZY FOR FIEGER SEFjnKHDF CANNOT GET ENOUGH FIEGER ACTION. ytfdshgjbfkliJ SAA SDNKFDKSJF FAT ASS ENJGLER! *
Sorry about that, Annie unfortunately snatched the computer away from me and temporarily lost her head. Annie secretly harbors a crush for Mr. Fieger, and admittedly, he's one hell of a ladies' man. I will be neither robust nor rich, just in debt and burned out. Annie seems to think that this would be sort of hip.
(Annie graciously intervenes)
(Sorry again, Annie will not be butting into today's entry anymore, I promise)
And while ladies and gentlemnen, I AM SQUIRREL NUTKIN! (Annie is really asking for it) we're on the topic of Amtrak and whathaveyou, I'd like to rant about the sickening irony of how the U.S., the world's premier capitalist nation, continues to subsidize the bloated cadaver of inefficiency that is Amtrak. I mean, $46 to make a 100 mile trip? France and all the other backward western European quasi-socialist nations have the best rail transit in the world (and so does Japan, Annie has just informed me. You know, the little bullet trains, pow!) Something is really wrong with this picture.
OK, that's all, back to work, bye.
Now is a good time to mention that while Evan and I were waiting in the train station, an embarrassing incident occurred. Evan swung his little Eddie Bauer backpack around, trying to be all macho like the guy on the Brawny paper towels commercial, and suddenly I heard a little buzzing noise. Imagine my surprise when it seemed to be coming from Evan's backpack. Of course, my prurient mind immediately thought that other people would think that Evan was harboring a "personal massager." But no, it was (or so he says) his Braun electric shaver. Buzz, buzz, buzz!
Now then, where were we? Oh yes, Annie has the cutest navy blue camisole shirt on (and no, I don't like it because she thinks it enhances her "bustiness") and a darling little powder blue skirt. Apparently she had some problems with the skirt earlier when riding her bike, and a couple of innocent bystanders were flashed. Oh my.
* this is a humorous tool taken from andrew's stockpile o' funny gags. so i thought i'd give him credit.